Friday, October 8, 2010

I’m Still Here – SortOf

Possibly you’ve noticed that I’ve been MIA for the last three weeks and really not much present for the few months before that.  I’ve been really struggling for a while with trying to decide what I want my blog to be and I can’t come to any decisions, so I’ve been avoiding it.

I’m not much of a writer.  I’ve never liked journaling and I’m not sure that I have anything new to say that hasn’t been said about a million times all over blogland, so I know I’m never going to be an every day blogger.

I’m not a decorator.  I actually have a really hard time decorating my house.  I think I’m more of a macro-design person.  I can paint a room or do a big project, but when it gets down to accessorizing, I got nothin’.  So I won’t be sharing all the cute new ways I’ve changed up my furniture and my decor.  I would be happy if I could just get a room “decorated” and then be able to leave it for a few years.

So, a while back I made a decision that this blog will just be here to share projects that I’ve completed that I won’t force myself to come up with post topics when there’s just nothing for me to write about.  The decision was half-hearted, at best, though and I couldn’t keep myself from looking around the house for the next project.  There are SO MANY projects that I want to do, though, that I can’t decide which one to start on.  I look and look for things that I want to change about my house so I’ll have a project…so I’ll have something to post about.

About a week ago, though, I realized that I’m not really enjoying my house.  I’m just walking through it, feeling not completely happy with the projects that I’ve finished and thinking about all the other things that need fixing.  Don’t get me wrong, I did that before I started the blog, but the blog just adds a little bit of extra pressure in the back of my head to pick a project (any project!) and get started, so I’ll have something to share.

That’s just not how I work, though.  I tend to go in fits and starts with my projects.  I’ll get a ton of motivation and get three projects started.  The projects, of course, always take longer than I thought, so as I finish them, I get wiped out and, by the time I’m done, I need a break.  So, I’ll slouch around, unmotivated, for a month or more and then suddenly, I’ll find my motivation again.

So, I’m realizing that I really need to change how I think about the blog.  I need to go back to its original purpose: to just share projects that I’ve completed in my own time (and maybe participate in a few linky parties).  The thought of doing that worries me a bit, though, because I really enjoy the conversations I’ve had with all the people I’ve met here in blogland and I worry that, if I only post once or twice a month, that will all dry up.  (Plus, as you all know, comments are REALLY fun to get!  I’ll miss heading to my Inbox to see if anyone’s commented on my latest post.)

I think for my own sanity, though, I need to take a step back.  From your point of view, it would seem I’ve already done that, but I still need to take that mental step and I’m going to do it today.  I’ll still be posting, just not as much as I used to (which, admittedly, was never a ton).  I hope you stick with me as I figure this out!

And, having said that, don’t touch that dial:  I got my motivation back!  I started a new project today and I’ve got at least one more that I’m ready to get started on!


  1. You sound exactly like me! I think life gives us enough pressure then to feel "pressured" to do a blog post. Isn't this supposed to be fun? I'm with you, do it on your time :)

  2. I agree with you. I only post when I have something to share. Sometimes there will be posts fairly often and sometimes not for weeks at a time. If people want to stop reading, that is their prerogative, but I do this for myself and then to share.

  3. Hi Diane. I've been where you are, and I occasionally bounce back and forth -- to blog or not to blog? For example, why am I here on your blog writing this comment? haha We don't really know each other.

    I'm not sure blogging is the right thing for me either, so I really can't advise you. I know for a fact that I spend far too much time on the computer, etc.

    So ask yourself what you are getting from it. Do you receive satisfaction in sharing your projects and then positive reinforcement from other people's comments? That's probably why I do it, but is that a good enough reason?

    I take pride in my blog -- I like to have everything laid out nicely, and when I visit my own blog, it's like walking into my home.

    But why does a blog give me pride? Why do I need positive reinforcement? Ahhhh -- you see, it feeds my ego. I guess I need that at this time in my life, and I think that's probably one of the biggest reasons I blog.

    And let's be serious. Who wants to blog if no one is going to read it? What's the fun in that? The goal is to have followers to read your posts. It's like writing a little article. What I want to know is how do I get paid!

    Blogging is probably not a healthy thing to do, to be quite honest; BUT it is a way to pass time and it is a way to learn about people and hobbies; you can help other people through your kind words and prayers, it can boost your ego! But as with pretty much anything on the internet, is it REAL LIFE? Wouldn't it be nicer to be able to connect in real life as opposed to looking at a picture on a screen?

    How will I even know if you read this? It's kind of like a fantasy land.

    You make the decision that is best for you! I actually wish that I hadn't started blogging, to be honest. Now I'm hooked I think, at least for today.

  4. Diane, every time I see a new post from you (like today), I click over to read it. I totally understand about taking a step back. And I'll still be reading... even if you only post a few times a month... and will eagerly click over every time I see a new one come up.

    Glad you found your motivation... looking forward to hearing about your new projects whenever you get around to posting next.

  5. It was so funny to read this post of yours--because earlier that day I had decided the exact same thing about my own blog. I decided my priorities needed to be on my family and not on my blog. So while it is still a fun outlet for me on occasion--I am taking a step back and enjoying my REAL life--not just my VIRTUAL life on the computer! So thanks for sharing!! And I still look forward to reading your posts whenever they happen. :o) Sharon


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