Possibly you’ve noticed that I’ve been MIA for the last three weeks and really not much present for the few months before that. I’ve been really struggling for a while with trying to decide what I want my blog to be and I can’t come to any decisions, so I’ve been avoiding it.
I’m not much of a writer. I’ve never liked journaling and I’m not sure that I have anything new to say that hasn’t been said about a million times all over blogland, so I know I’m never going to be an every day blogger.
I’m not a decorator. I actually have a really hard time decorating my house. I think I’m more of a macro-design person. I can paint a room or do a big project, but when it gets down to accessorizing, I got nothin’. So I won’t be sharing all the cute new ways I’ve changed up my furniture and my decor. I would be happy if I could just get a room “decorated” and then be able to leave it for a few years.
So, a while back I made a decision that this blog will just be here to share projects that I’ve completed that I won’t force myself to come up with post topics when there’s just nothing for me to write about. The decision was half-hearted, at best, though and I couldn’t keep myself from looking around the house for the next project. There are SO MANY projects that I want to do, though, that I can’t decide which one to start on. I look and look for things that I want to change about my house so I’ll have a project…so I’ll have something to post about.
About a week ago, though, I realized that I’m not really enjoying my house. I’m just walking through it, feeling not completely happy with the projects that I’ve finished and thinking about all the other things that need fixing. Don’t get me wrong, I did that before I started the blog, but the blog just adds a little bit of extra pressure in the back of my head to pick a project (any project!) and get started, so I’ll have something to share.
That’s just not how I work, though. I tend to go in fits and starts with my projects. I’ll get a ton of motivation and get three projects started. The projects, of course, always take longer than I thought, so as I finish them, I get wiped out and, by the time I’m done, I need a break. So, I’ll slouch around, unmotivated, for a month or more and then suddenly, I’ll find my motivation again.
So, I’m realizing that I really need to change how I think about the blog. I need to go back to its original purpose: to just share projects that I’ve completed in my own time (and maybe participate in a few linky parties). The thought of doing that worries me a bit, though, because I really enjoy the conversations I’ve had with all the people I’ve met here in blogland and I worry that, if I only post once or twice a month, that will all dry up. (Plus, as you all know, comments are REALLY fun to get! I’ll miss heading to my Inbox to see if anyone’s commented on my latest post.)
I think for my own sanity, though, I need to take a step back. From your point of view, it would seem I’ve already done that, but I still need to take that mental step and I’m going to do it today. I’ll still be posting, just not as much as I used to (which, admittedly, was never a ton). I hope you stick with me as I figure this out!
And, having said that, don’t touch that dial: I got my motivation back! I started a new project today and I’ve got at least one more that I’m ready to get started on!